I am the woman that stalks your newborn baby down the food aisles just to catch another glimpse.
I am the woman who coos over their soft cheeks and perfect tiny features.
I am the woman who lingers a little too long.
Miss A is one and a half now and a fully fledged, walking, talking little person. She is a whirlwind, a beauty and delight but she is not a baby anymore. And I’m not quite ready for those days to be over.
It all seemed to go too fast. I know everyone says it does but when you are in the midst of it, you can’t see the other side. Now I am the other side, I want to replay it all, slow it down, relive those first cuddles and tiny toes. I want to breath in her newness again and marvel at how I made this perfect little person.
I am the woman that is mourning the end of her baby days.
I am the woman who can’t believe she’ll never have a newborn again
I am the woman that wants to freeze her children in time.
My little boy is 4 in a few weeks and starting school in September. He is hurtling out of his early years and I am clinging onto his littleness before it’s too late. I love how engaged he is with the world, all the questions he has and how much fun we are going to have together as he grows up. But I want to hold him so close and never let him go.
I know we’re not having any more, for many reasons. Financially, emotionally and practically it makes sense for us to stop at two. Throw infertility, a miscarriage and two traumatic births into the mix and it would be silly to go for any more. I feel lucky and blessed with what I have.
But that doesn’t stop the yearning. That doesn’t stop the broodiness overflowing.
I know I am seeing it all through rose tinted glasses. I know I am glossing over the pain, exhaustion and relentlessness of bringing a baby into this world. But that’s the thing with being broody, I don’t have to worry about all that. I can just think about the baby kicks, the magical moment of meeting that tiny person and the endorphin fuelled sleepy snuggles.
I am the woman that I thought I’d never be.
I am the woman that just can’t let go.
I am the broody one.
I’m not a mommy yet but I have to admit that I’m looking forward to it. My mother says that my generation is lucky to have all the technology to “freeze” the moments. I can’t imagine how hard it is to see the time going by so fast but you’ll have a lot of beautiful moments ahead of you 🙂
Me too and my baby is only 10 months!!!
really can relate to this at the moment. I never thought I’d be the broody type, but I’m desperate to have another baby and we’ve had joy after a year and a half. They’re just so precious! x
This is a lovely post, and whilst I can’t say I am ready for more (1 then twins which is still very challenging!!) I do want them to stop growing up
Such a beautifully written post. I can relate to this as I’m so broody too, but who knows if/when we will have another! x
Well written. I was like this before, I was desperate for another baby. I soon stopped but then the urge of wanting another came back again. I hope I don’t go through it again!
Ah a lovely post, mine are 12,7 & 7 and I would love to have another one….however it wouldnt be right for us as a family. My best friend is pregnant and I’m going to take my broodiness out on her baby instead!!!
Such a lovely post, our eldest is now nearing her 6th birthday and it’s quite bittersweet! We’re currently pregnant with our last baby and I know it will be tough fighting the broodiness after this one grows up too! xx